GOD’s goodness running after me

In my life, I have had two recurring dreams. These are dreams that you have one night and it either replays the same dream over, adds to the dream or replays and adds.

I was recently asked if I would be willing to write about some dreams I had when I was young. But I don’t know what they mean, so I was hesitant to write about them. Why bother?

When I was a child, I had the first recurring dream. It was the type where you have it the first night then the next night it is the same dream again with something added. This lasted four nights.

The weird thing is that I don’t remember much about the part I dreamed about all four nights, but I remember clearly about the dream on the third and fourth nights.

In the dream, I was running through a huge mansion and two tigers, a white one an an orange one, were chasing me. I went from room to room trying to get away. These are the rooms that I don’t recall the details of.

On the third night, I again was in the mansion being chased by a white tiger and and orange tiger 🐅 through the mansion. Then I came to a staircase with a large chandelier on the ceiling lighting the staircase. I ran up the twisting stairs to get to the second floor. There were three doors that were closed. I ran to the first, but it was locked. I ran to the second door, but it was locked. I turned to see the tigers were now at the top of the stairs. I turned and ran to the end of the hall to the last door, but it was locked. Then I woke up. SIGH! I was still alive and was afraid to go back to sleep.

But on the fourth night sleep came and I was once again in the mansion being chased by the tigers. Nothing had changed. It was all the same. I was running, tigers chasing me, many rooms, the staircase, the chandelier, the doors at the top of the stairs, the locked doors, the tigers on the second floor with me at the end of a hall that had no where else for me to go.

I turned to face my most certain death by turning towards the tigers. But to my astonishment, the tigers also turned so they were no longer chasing me. And then I saw them attack a dark shadowed figure. They were not chasing me, they were protecting me from whatever it was that was chasing me.

So why am I writing about my dream now? Because I know a little bit about this dream that I didn’t know before.

The other night I had a song called, “Goodness of GOD” playing in my head. I was brushing my teeth and humming the chorus with my eyes closed. And suddenly I was in a vision, I was in the dream and I saw the tigers.

The chorus lyrics are, “Your goodness is running after it’s running after me. Your goodness is running after, running after me. With all my life laid down I surrender, I give You everything. Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me.”

It suddenly occurred to me. I have been running from GOD’S goodness and mercy. I try to spot it in my life but have a very hard time doing so. And I see that it’s because it’s different than what I thought it was.

His goodness and mercy are dangerous and able to wound us if needed. But His goodness and mercy also protect us and inflict harm on that which chases us which is not of Him.  It’s hard to understand but the most simple thing too. I laugh, because this is so like the GOD I know Him to be.

And the doors? I believe that they are three things that I have had to surrender to GOD. And probably the reason I am just understanding the dream from my childhood is because I am finally surrendering the three hardest things to Him… My desire to be whole, to be able to work, and to minister to people through my career; the desire to get the medical help that I need in order to be restored to health; and my biggest desire, to be married to the godly man who will worship, pray and minister with me.

The chandelier was very, very intricate and large… I’m guessing it represents GOD’S WORD. But the rest of the dream, I have no idea.

I decided to write about this to ask those who read it: Are you running from GOD’S goodness? Do you see it in your life or is it something that is hard to spot?

Please ask yourself and ask GOD. And let me know what you hear.